As parents, we want our children to be happy, healthy, and well-adjusted. But navigating the complex world of emotions can be challenging for both children and adults. That’s where emotion coaching comes in.
Emotion coaching is an approach to parenting that helps children learn how to understand and regulate their emotions. Developed by Dr. John Gottman, emotion coaching involves five key steps:
- Be aware of your child’s emotions: Pay attention to your child’s emotional cues, such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language. This can help you understand what they’re feeling and why.
- Recognize and label your child’s emotions: Use words to describe your child’s emotions, such as “I can see that you’re feeling sad right now.” This can help your child develop a vocabulary for their emotions and feel understood.
- Help your child understand and regulate their emotions: Teach your child about emotions and how to manage them in healthy ways. For example, you might say, “When you feel angry, you can take deep breaths or count to ten to calm down.”
- Validate your child’s emotions: Let your child know that their emotions are important and valid, even if you don’t always agree with them. For example, you might say, “It’s okay to feel frustrated. I understand that this is hard for you.”
- Help your child problem-solve: Work with your child to find solutions to problems that are causing difficult emotions. For example, you might say, “Let’s think of some ways we can handle this situation so that you feel better.”
Emotion coaching can have many benefits for children. It can help them develop emotional intelligence, which is the ability to understand and manage their own emotions and those of others. It can also help them build resilience, which is the ability to bounce back from setbacks and challenges.
Research has shown that children who are raised with emotion coaching tend to have better mental health, social skills, and academic performance. They also tend to have stronger relationships with their parents and peers.
As parents, we can all benefit from learning more about emotion coaching. There are many resources available, such as books, workshops, and online courses. By using the principles of emotion coaching in our daily lives, we can help our children thrive emotionally and socially.
Reference:
Gottman, J. M., & DeClaire, J. (1997). Raising an emotionally intelligent child: The heart of parenting. Simon and Schuster.
